My Friend is a Hero

I have a very good friend whose IQ is way above average. He’s graduated from the most prestigious university in Iran (Sharif Uni.), and got his masters degree in engineering in Canada. He did so well in school that he got hired right after school in a company which designs and manufactures private jets. What he specifically does in this company is that he designs toilets for these jets (not the washroom, but the actual toilet bowl). And it made me wonder how much work does it take to design toilets, cause he works 9 hours a day, 5 days a week, only designing toilets. But then I realized that when one pays $50 Million for a jet, they’d like the toilet to be tailored to their arses or, as my friend explained to me, some prefer to see the reflection of their urine and genitourinary organs in gold, while others prefer silver reflection (thank heavens for capitalism).

(Once I suggested that he designs a toilet bowl only for women – like urinals for men. Cause urinating for women is a pretty harsh and knee breaking experience. We have to half sit and half stand while aiming … let’s not get into the details and suffice to the fact that it’s a very uncomfortable experience. All he did was to say that it was a good idea, but I haven’t seen any sketches yet.)

Anyways, you might expect that he pees in a broken bowl at home while he designs them at work (according to the famous Persian proverb: “Koozegar …”); but you’ve guessed wrong. He’s actually designed the most fascinating toilet bowl ever for his apartment. Due to his love of music he’s designed a bowl that plays music synchronized with one’s urination. For example if you pee slowly in sinus rhythm from side to side, it’ll play Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake; If you urinate in incontinues but rhythmic fashion it’ll play Paul Oakenfold’s Global Underground. But the best part is when you manage to urinate one drop every 5 seconds for a minute it’ll play …? precisely my dear friends: Pink Floyd’s Echoes.